Since Christmas has now passed I thought it
time to make my Boxing Day confession. I have always been deeply disturbed by
the lyrics of “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus”.
I see 3 possible explanation of this song, none
of them particularly pleasant, bearing in mind that it is clear from what is
said that “Daddy” is not present:
1: That it isn’t Santa, but instead a
secret lover of Mommy, who has snuck in using the disguise of Santa. If so,
shame on them!
2: It is actually Santa. In which case, I have
to ask myself what other devilish trickery is Santa up to? Are all the Mommy’s
in the world safe? Shouldn’t he be busy delivering present?
3: That Santa is really Daddy in disguise.
This is the safest option and only suggest that either Mommy or Daddy have some
sort of Santa fetish going on, which I can quite understand, as I have always
found Mrs Santa outfits rather appealing.
The problem is that it isn’t explained, and
the no knowing has been playing with my mind for countless years. Surely I can’t
be the only person bothered by this, can I?
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